What a Pinteresting Thought!

Pinterest is something that is still relatively new to my life, but it's obvious that I was instantly addicted.  I've already made two Pinterest recipes (and plan on making two more this week)!  It's inspired me to finally learn to crochet!  I've got my future "When I Get Insanely Rich" wardrobe all planned.  I love it!  If you haven't been to Pinterest, you really need to check it out! That is, unless you have something really important on your agenda.  If you have an important agenda, I suggest you wait until you're done with it, because all shreds of productivity fly out the window as soon as you start pinning.

Once again, I'm taking a cue from Mel at Little Mrs. Married.  She knows where to find all of these cute blog link-ups!






Share your Pinterest finds on your blog and link up at The Vintage Apple!

I think I'm going to spread this out over a few Wednesdays and devote each post to a specific Pin Board.  Otherwise, I might bombard you with more pictures of buttery, cheesy foods and expensive outfits and perfectly styled homes than a person could handle in one post.  Today's board: Favorite Recipes.

Let me begin my saying that I think my favorite things that I find on Pinterest are the recipes!  Of course they're all loaded with fat. But until I can find an excuse to make these dishes, it's at least fun to look at the pictures and drool.

Source: laurenslatest.com via Emily on Pinterest

I've been staring at this bread for weeks.  Haven't built up the courage to make it yet, though.

Source: divine-baking.com via Emily on Pinterest

I see these in my near future.

Source: tastykitchen.com via Emily on Pinterest

I love fried okra, but it's unfortunately only a "sometimes food."  But this oven-fried version looks worth trying!

Source: the-country-cook.blogspot.com via Emily on Pinterest

So. Much. Cheese!

Source: closetcooking.com via Emily on Pinterest

Yumm!  Bread topped with Spinach and Artichoke Dip!

Source: plainchicken.com via Carolyn on Pinterest

This dip is all over Pinterest.  It's called "Crack Dip" because it's supposedly so yummy it's addicting.

Sidenote: I actually got to make crack dip tonight!  The people at the grocery store didn't give my bag with the dressing mix or the chips (so frustrating!), so I improvised and used ranch dressing and cut back on the sour cream.  I definitely want to try it again the right way, but even before sitting for 24 hours, it was still damn good! Pictures to come tomorrow (maybe)!

Source: chefjulieyoon.com via Emily on Pinterest

It seems like every time I bake I'm calling my mom and asking her about some sort of measurement conversion, so this will be really helpful too!

In order to join Pinterest and start making your own boards, you actually have to be invited.  You can either request to be invited and wait for an invite from Pinterest (which I did and let me tell you, I do not think 72 hours could have possibly gone any slower) OR you can post your e-mail in a comment and I'll gladly send you an invite.  :) Because really, who likes to wait?

And now it's time for the 30 Day Photo Challenge!  Day 23: Sunset!

I like sunsets.  They mean I've made it through another day.

Bloggity Bloggity Blog

Tonight, I am cooking myself dinner for the first time in a month and a half.  Nothing fancy, but I figure it's a step up from the Beef Ramen and buttered pasta I've been making for myself.

Tonight I'm making Ranch Chicken.   It's super simple.  So simple, in fact that even though I haven't looked at the recipe since I stumbled across it 6 weeks ago, I was still able to make it.  I took half of a chicken breast, put it in a gallon ziploc bag with some ranch dressing and smooshed it around so that it was coated.  I would have shown you pictures, but ranch dressing is one of those foods that, as tasty as it can be, can look kind of disgusting. Then I transferred the chicken into another gallon ziploc bag with some Italian style bread crumbs and shook it around until it was completely coated.  Put it on a greased cookie sheet, spray it with some Olive Oil spray and put it in a 350 degree oven. 30 minutes later, you have safe-to-consume chicken!

It turned out good enough.  It wasn't as flavorful as I expected it to be and I'm not sure if I like the flavor that the breadcrumbs add.  I may try it again and let the chicken "marinade" in the dressing for a few hours and then use Panko breadcrumbs instead of Italian breadcrumbs.  Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?  I am fed and I took a step and ventured out of the microwave for the first time in a while. I'm proud of that.  And that's all the really matters, right?

On a completely unrelated note, this cold I'm recovering from has left my Diet Coke tasting like Pepsi.  Cold, you have crossed the line! I am not pleased.

Enough of that! Now it's time for Day 22, Trees!

This picture was taken during my junior year of high school.  My choir took a trip to Spain to sing in several cathedrals.  This picture was from the first night.  We spent 13-ish hours on a plane and then drove 10 more hours to our first city, Sevilla.  We were exhausted and jet lagged, but somehow found the energy to walk around the city for a bit once we arrived.  This tree was near our hotel and was huge!  We never figured out what kind of tree it was, but it was big enough that there was no way we could get a picture of the whole tree or even the whole trunk.  Cool tree.  Cool tree.

And now I leave you with a song I've been listening to a lot lately.  My goodness, I love the Ben Folds Pandora station and the artists it introduces me too.

Stupid Walls

Dead Week has arrived at good ol' L.S. of U. And for the first time in the history of ever, I actually have a dead "Dead Week"—No tests, no projects due, nothing stressful on my calendar for the next 7 days.  It's wonderful!  So today, I went to my 8:30 class, came home immediately after because the rest of my classes were canceled, and gave my body one last day of rest before I go into full-fledged psycho-studying-for-finals mode.  I took a nap, I watched some Gilmore Girls and vegged. It was glorious.  And I arose ready to face the world and a project that I have due next Tuesday.

Then that lovely wall that always somehow rears its ugly head made its ugly entrance.

You want to know what a huge pet peeve of mine is? (Warning: Tangent Ahead!)  Teachers that require fancy software for classes.  Take this semester, for example:  I had a teacher that required fancy software that you absolutely needed if you wanted to complete your midterm or final project.  Sure, we meet in a lab that has the software once a week, but that lab time needs to be used to actually learn the things you will need to apply to these projects.  So really, you need this (Windows Only) software to succeed in this class, which, if you were a Mac person like me, meant either tainting your Mac with Windows and opening it up to viruses or buying a freaking PC.  I ended up buying a PC, which has worked out just fine because some of my other class's textbooks included supplemental CDs that were only PC compatible.   BUT this software is a student edition of a full-fledged transcription software, meaning you can't actually install it onto your PC.  So when the information you need for this project is posted in the format of the software, you can't actually open the information because your computer doesn't recognize the program as one that can open files because you can't install the software onto the computer because it is a student edition.  And the free lab to work on this final project was cancelled for one reason or another leaving me (and I'm sure a ton of other students) stuck. *Insert explicative here*

Stupid Wall.

So what does this mean for you?  Nothing much other than the fact that I am now blogging out my frustrations because I can't work on my project.

It also means that it's time for 30 Day Photo Challenge Day 21: Pretty Pattern!


I absolutely adore scarves.  They're adorable,  they're versatile and they're warm!  My scarf obsession started my junior year of high school when I went to Spain with my choir  and there were street vendors selling scarves all over the place for 4 or 5 euros apiece.  I've been hooked ever since.

This is about 1/3 or my scarf collection.  See the one in the middle?  I got that one at a Rest Stop in Spain and it's one of my favorites!  It doesn't keep me as warm as some of the others do but it's so pretty!

Well, I guess it's time for me to put on my big girl pants and start studying for exams.  I've been given the gift of a real "Dead Week."  I should probably take advantage of it

5-in-1

I have quite a bit of catch-up to do on the 30 Day Photo Challenge.  Silly holidays got in the way of my picture taking.  I promise it won't happen again :)  And no, of course I don't have my fingers crossed behind my back...

So, let's get started.

Day 16: What I Ate

I completely forgot to take pictures of my food on Day 16.  So instead, I'll show you what I made for breakfast on Thanksgiving morning!

Pumpkin pancakes—another Pinterest recipe!  I would give you the recipe, but I want to try to make them one more time before I do.  They tasted great, but the texture was kind of off.  They were kind of heavy and didn't rise at all.  I'm not sure if that's due to a problem with the recipe or to the fact that our baking powder wasn't as fresh as it could have been.  Once I've tried it with newer baking powder, I'll let you know if the recipe is one worth sharing :)

Day 17: On the Shelf!

I love my bookshelf!  It's so nice and neat and organized!

Top Shelf:  Most of the books that I keep at my apartment.  I have waay more at home.  There's also a picture of my parents at the beach and a piece of driftwood that I found on a walk with my mom my last morning at the beach this year.  On top of the bookshelf is a picture of the 2008 cast and crew of Dracula at Baton Rouge Little Theater and a picture of all of the winners from the 2010 BRLT Beaux Arts Ball—the year I won Best Supporting Actress in a Play!

The next two shelves:  My DVDs (This is the majority of my DVD collection) and a picture of my grandparents.  The lower shelf holds my the entire series of Gilmore Girls and Lost on DVD.  The picture is of my friend Ronald and I.  The picture is from the Baton Rouge Little Theater's 2010 production of Private Lives in which Ronald played my husband.

And the bottom two shelves:  The top shelf holds my books that are too tall to stand up (including the Lost Encyclopedia, The Paddington Treasury, The Annotated Alice in Wonderland, Apartment Therapy, and a book about lefties that my mom got me at a garage sale), Scrabble Slam and Phase 10 card games, a brick from the beach house that my family went to every year until Hurricane Ivan destroyed it and my photo album.  The bottom shelf holds extra notebooks, all of my music and my textbooks.

Congratulations! You are now an expert in my bookshelf!  I'm always really interested in things like what other people keep on their bookshelves and in their kitchens and on their walls.  I think it's a really neat glimpse into someone's life that can tell you a lot about them.

Day 18: In My Bag

This is another thing that really fascinates me—what other women keep in their purses.  Sometimes it inspires me to keep my purse neater; sometimes it makes me feel slightly less psycho when I see that other women's purses are just as black hole-ish as mine seems to be. 

At this very moments, the contents of my purse include:

A headband, assorted medicines, contacts lens drops, glucose tablets, lip balm, lip gloss, lip stick, a CVS receipt, a pen, my eyeglasses, two packets of tissues, my iPhone, my iPod, earbuds, a compact mirror, my sunglasses, iPhone charger, wallet, various coupons, a tin of Altoids and a pack of gum.  

Normally my keys would be in there too.  I know it seems like a ton of stuff, but it's all essential, I promise!  And my purse is deceptively huge.  It may seem like a lot of stuff, but once you put it in my purse there's still a ton of room left.

Day 19: Where I Slept

Okay, this isn't actually where I slept on Day 19.  I actually slept at my parent's house.  But my bed at my parent's house is messy and has mismatched sheets and blankets.  My apartment bed, on the other hand, is nice and neat with color coordinated comforter, quilt and pillows.  You would have chosen to post the apartment bed too :)

This also gives me the chance to show off one of my favorite things in my room: my framed poster of Georges Seurat's A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grand Jatte.  Have you seen Stephen Sondheim's Sunday in the Park with George?  You really should, especially if you're an artist, performer, musician, etc.  If you've seen that musical, you'll understand why I love that painting so much.

And finally, today's picture!  Day 20: What I Read

I don't have time to read any sort of "for myself" book.  All I have time for is textbooks.  I know, sad.  But I do have a list of books I'm planning to read once school is out including The King's Speech and Jaycee Dugard's memoir.  But until then, all of my "for fun" reading is in blog form.  So today, I'll share a few of my favorite blogs with you!

First off is my friend Mel who writes Little Mrs. Married!  Mel is always so sweet and optimistic and funny and her blog is so cute!  I also get some cute blog ideas from her, like those fill-in-the-blanks!

Next is Marriage Confessions!  I have not personally met Katie, who writes it, but I bet if we were to meet, we would get along swimmingly!  She writes about her marriage, her children, her difficulties with baking, her family, everything!  And she's a fellow redhead!  She's really honest about her life and seems to have very similar viewpoints to mine when it comes to things like parenting (I know, I'm no where near that point yet!  But I want to be ready and it's never to early to have opinions about that kind of thing in my opinion!).  I've been reading blogs and articles about parenting lately because I'll be working a lot with parents in my future work as an Early Intervention SLP and I think it's important to try to understand as best I can all of these aspects of parenting and the decisions that parents have to make and what goes into those thought processes, especially because the children I'll be working with are so young (Birth to 3). I feel like I get a lot of insight into that on Katie's blog.  

Next is Bakerella!  Like I've mentioned before, I discovered how much I love the kitchen once I moved into my apartment and I'm working of "re-discovering" that love.  Bakerella is adorable and is the master of Cake Pops (which I will be making in the next couple of weeks!).  And she has so many cute recipes that I'm dying to try!

And finally, PostSecret! If you've been living under a rock and have never heard of PostSecret, the basic concept is that people from all over the world write their secret on a post card and anonymously mail it to Frank Warren, the man behind Post Secret.  Every Sunday, he posts a handful of secrets on the PostSecret website.  PostSecret is more therapeutic than anything else.  We all have our secrets, things we only tell those we are most close to (or maybe not even them).  They may be tiny and seem insignificant, or they may be huge and painful to carry around.  I've never sent a physical postcard to Frank, but I have posted on the PostSecret app and it's very releasing to just put your secret out there for everyone to see.  And I've on more than one occasion come across my own secret on PostSecret.com written in someone else's handwriting.  If you haven't been to PostSecret, you really should check it out!

Well, there you have it!  Now that Thanksgiving has passed, I should do a lot better about keeping up with this photo challenge!  That is, until Christmas madness kicks in...

My dad and I put up the Christmas tree in my apartment today.  Holiday Spirit has been hard to come by for me this year, but I must admit that I felt a twinge of some sort of spirit as we decorated the tree.

And this is just a picture of my cats because they were getting along for once and eating peacefully next to each other.  A rare occurrence for these kitties.

That's all (for tonight), folks!  Enjoy the last few hours of your Thanksgiving holiday (if you got one) and have a great Monday (if there is such a thing...)!

Woof Woof!

It's official: I am absolutely, positively, head-over heels in love with Pinterest.  It appeals to the most domestic, stylish, crafty, bake-tastic aspects of my personality.  If you haven't been on Pinterest, you should definitely check it out after you read this post (because if you go before you're done reading, you'll get sucked in and there's no way you'll ever think twice about coming back here)!!

Some of my favorite finds on Pinterest are all of the recipes!  I've got a Pin board devoted to nothing but fattening, delicious recipes that I'm dying to try (I just need a few victims!...er...tasters!).  Remember my blog post about making Red Velvet Cakesters?  I found that recipe on Pinterest!  I can spend hours just looking at all of the food on Pinterest.  And sometimes, I do...

If you're a fellow Pinner, you might recognize this recipe I tried last night.  Different variations of it are all over Pinterest and last night I finally gave in a tried it.  Last night, I made Puppy Chow!

Despite it's canine friendly name, this is definitely not a snack for your pooch.  It is sweet, chocolately, peanutty, 100% people food. And so easy to make!  Start to finish, it didn't take me more than 20 minutes to make a huge batch. And it would have taken even less time if I had a 2 gallon bag like the recipe called for (more on that later).

I decided to make the classic, "Chex official" recipe.  First you melt together semisweet chocolate, peanut butter, and butter (I used crunchy peanut butter because that's what we had in the house.  I loved the little peanut bits mixed in with the chow!).  Oh...and the recipe calls for you to add vanilla to the chocolate mixture after you melt it, but I kind of sort of completely spaced and forgot to do that. Oops! So, if you're one of those awesome people who remembers to follow the recipe, you would add vanilla here. If you're like me, you just pretend that vanilla doesn't exist and completely ignore what the recipe calls for. :)

 Then you dump it all over 9 cups of Chex cereal.  You can use rice, corn, wheat or chocolate Chex (or all 4 if you're feeling adventurous).  I used rice Chex (which are gluten free!).

Mix it all together as gently as you can.  Some pieces are going to break.  It's unavoidable.  But the goal is to have more whole pieces than broken pieces once you're done mixing.

 Then the recipe tells you to put it all in a 2-gallon zip-loc bag.  But really, who just has a 2-gallon zip-loc bag on hand?  So I put half of the mix in a one gallon bag and it worked fine.  Put 3/4 of a cup of powdered sugar in your 1 gallon bag and shake like crazy!  Repeat with the rest of the mixture.

 Pour it all out onto a wax (or parchment) paper lined cookie sheet so it can cool and set and there you have it!  Home-made puppy chow!

Warning: If you make this recipe, make sure you have people to share it with, because this stuff is super addictive!  And this recipe makes a ton of chow!  You definitely do not want a full recipe of this stuff sitting around.  You'll just find yourself grabbing another handful every time you pass by until it's all gone.  And your tummy will not be pleased.  Just trust me on this.

So, if you have 20 (or 15 if you happen to have a 2-gallon zip-loc bag lying around.  Where would you even find one of those?!) minutes to spare, I definitely recommend you make some Puppy Chow!  And then I recommend you find someone to share it with! 

Puppy Chow

Prep Time: 15 minutes

Start to Finish: 15 minutes

Makes: 18-1/2 cup servings

Ingredients:

• 9 Cups Rice, Corn, Wheat, or Chocolate Chex Cereal
• 1 Cup Semisweet Chocolate Chips
• 1/2 Cup Peanut Butter
• 1/4 Cup Butter or Margarine
• 1 Teaspoon Vanilla
• 1 1/2 Cups Powdered Sugar

Directions:

1. In a large bowl, measure cereal. Set aside.
2. In a 1 quart microwavable bowl, microwave chocolate chips, peanut butter and butter uncovered on High 1 minute; stir.  Microwave about 30 seconds longer or until mixture can be stirred smooth.  Stir in vanilla.  Pour mixture over cereal, stirring until evenly coated.  Pour into a 2-gallon resealable food-storage plastic bag.
3. Add powdered sugar.  Seal bag; shake until well coated.  Spread on waxed paper to cool.  Store in an airtight container in refrigerator. 

You can find the nutritional information (if you dare!) here.

Happy chowing!  

An Appetizer

Hello, all! I know I've been rather MIA for the past few days. There's been family and holidays and a persistent little cold keeping me away. But I'm back! There's a new recipe post as well as a 5-in-1 photo challenge post headed your way! But to hold you over until then, here's another fun fill-in-the-blank quiz that I found on Little Mrs. Married! Think of it as a little appetizer for the posts to come :)

1. Waking up at the break of dawn to go shopping is my idea of HELL. I am absolutely not a morning person, I get claustrophobic and I get anxious. I'll go Black Friday shopping, but I wait until the last two hours that the mall is open to go. It's a lot calmer and, since I'm almost never shopping for some super in-demand item, I can still get everything I need.

2. If I were to go shopping today I would be on the hunt for either clothes or a new camera. I can never have enough clothes. But I'd like to get a nicer camera. The point and shoot that I have right now is fine, but it's kind of beat up and is starting to lose its focus abilities. I'd like a sturdier, more SLR-like camera. But a camera is such a big purchase for me that I'll spend forever researching options and never actually buy one.

3. The best thing I ate yesterday was Honey Baked Ham. That stuff is freaking delicious.

4. Something I've been learning lately is that I have to be honest with myself. And that it's ok to still be just as sad 5 weeks and 5 days later.

5. I cannot start my day without my allergy medicine. If I don't have my medicine in the morning, I will be miserable for at least 5 days after.

6. My nighttime attire consists of pj pants and an oversized comfy t-shirt or (depending on the weather and my mood) a nightgown.

7. I am looking forward to some baking I have planned for the near future and the auditions that I have in a couple of weeks. And the end of fall semester. And taking ballet and musical theater classes next semester. And owning a Shiba Inu and a Greyhound in the not so near future :)

How can you not love that face? :)

Something to Be Thankful For

Y'all, I have an awful confession to make—one that is going to make me seem like the most awful person on the face of the earth.

I am having a lot of trouble feeling thankful this Thanksgiving.

How ridiculous is that?  I'm awful! I know that I have a lot to be thankful for.  I have a wonderful, loving family and incredibly supportive friends. I'm healthy and I have the means to see a doctor when necessary. I'm getting a great education. I have a roof over my head and a bed to sleep in. I have food on my plate, clean water and warm clothing.  I have wonderful opportunities and a bright future.

I know that I have so much to be thankful for.  I just don't feel thankful.  I don't think about these things, smile and note how fortunate and lucky I am.  I'm not saying that I take these things for granted.  I just have to remind myself how fortunate I am.  I've been struggling with a lot lately and feeling thankful is just something to add to the list.

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.  I'm not excited.  I'm not eagerly anticipating platefuls of turkey and green bean casserole and pecan pie.  I have no clue what channel the parade is on or what time it even starts.  Thanksgiving has always been one of my favorite holidays.  It's all about food and family and love.  It's the start of the Christmas season!  I don't know what's wrong with me this year.

Actually, I do know what's wrong.  If you had asked me two months ago how I thought my Thanksgiving would be, I would have painted you a different picture than the one I'm giving you now.  I have made progress since my break-up.  But the fact of the matter is, in my mind, there will be someone important to me missing from my family's table tomorrow.  There's nothing I can do about that.  And it just makes me really sad.  I have been dreading Thanksgiving so much for the past month.  I love Thanksgiving with my family so much and I was so excited to get to share that with my boyfriend and to get to share my boyfriend with my family.  It hurts that I won't get to do that tomorrow.  It really hurts.

So, here I am on this Thanksgiving eve.  I'm having a lot of trouble feeling thankful because I'm really having a lot of trouble feeling anything other than sad.  I've always known that the holiday season can bring out the best in people.  This year, I'm learning that it can also draw attention to those who are absent in our lives.  

There are people who live their entire life and never know what it means to be in love.  At 20, I know what it means to love and trust someone with all of your being.  I know the complete happiness and joy that one feels with every "You're beautiful" and "I love you."  I have seen the gaze that can make your heart leap and I know how full that kind of love can make you feel.  Yes, I have lost it.  But at least I have known it.

That's something to be thankful for.

My friend Melissa posted this picture on her blog Little Mrs. Married earlier this week. 

                              

And you should read this post of hers too!  When you're done, just imagine me standing over your shoulder saying "Ditto."

Have a happy Thanksgiving tomorrow, my lovely readers!  Eat a lot, take a nap and enjoy time with those you love.

Girly Stuff

Day 15: My Shoes

I love my shoes—all 29 pairs :)  DSW is a really wonderful place.

And I love how pretty and organized they look in my hanging shoe organizers—like a library of shoes! Except I don't do check outs. 

And on another note, I got myself that manicure I promised myself.

The color looks black in the picture, but it's this really pretty deep purple color.

They were a little rough on my cuticles, though.  My poor thumb is still sore :(  

Today was a day for cleaning, Gilmore Girls and lots of hot tea. Gallons of hot tea.  Tons of hot tea.

Not a bad day.

A Thought

Day 14: Flowers

A thousand yellow daisies.

Gilmore Girls gives me false hope.  It makes me operate under the assumption that all heartbreak will be resolved in a 4-6 episode arc.

I do not think my heartbreak will be resolved in a 4-6 episode arc.

But, one way or another, it will be resolved.  It has to be.

I wish I lived in Stars Hallow, CT.

I wish Stars Hallow, CT actually existed.

Randomness

1. I tried to teach myself to crochet today, but I spent more time trying to untangle the yarn and gave up.  I went to Wal-Mart later to get a new thing of yarn and got some really thick yarn and a really thick crochet needle and now it's much easier.  It's kind of like the big crayons you give to kids when they're learning to write, I think.

2.  I keep Mike and Ikes in my car's glove box for when my blood sugar gets low.

3. I tried to go Christmas shopping today.  I ended up getting more stuff for myself.  But it was really cute stuff.

4. I started watching Gilmore Girls last night.  I missed it.

5.  I'm auditioning for a show in a few weeks and I'm already freaking out nervous.

6.  My brother is coming into town for Thanksgiving.  I'm excited to see him.

7. I forgot to take a 30 Day Photo Challenge Picture today.  So this is what you get for Day 8: From a Distance:

The view from my bed.

8. Lorelai and Max just split up on Gilmore Girls and first the first time I truly understood what she felt in that moment because I'm still feeling it every second of every day.

9.  All of my classes for Tuesday were cancelled.  I think I'm going to celebrate by getting a manicure.

10.. I have some really wonderful friends that offer some really great perspectives.

Crafty Close-Up

I've been wanting to learn to crochet for a while.  And I feel like it would be a good distraction.

So today, on my way home from a (wonderful) meeting with a friend, I decided to stop by good ol' Wal-Mart (which was so horribly understaffed that they had only 4 lanes open and about two hundred customers waiting to check out..but I won't bore you with that) and picked up some purple yarn and a few crochet hooks (because I can't I didn't know which one was the right one).

I learned to knit a few years back using the trusty old interwebz, so I thought I would learn to crochet the same way....

WRONG.  I can't figure out how to get past the chain stitch, which is the starting stitch.  So what I'm left with are the beginnings of a very wide scarf.  Or a very long, thin scarf.  Depending on how you look at it.

So, let's take a look at 30 Day Photo Challenge Day 12: Close-Up!

That's as close-up as my phone was willing to go.  On the right, you can see the chain stitch.  Or the entire scarf.  Really depends on perspective.

Annnnndd....that's all I got.  I'm sleepy.  Night night.

Roller Coaster

I have had a rough couple of days.  That's why I didn't blog yesterday and I'm not getting around to it until late tonight.  I've had some incredibly low lows and some "ok" and even "good" moments as well.  For the most part I've just been incredibly sad.  Not angry.  Not confused.  Not struggling to understand.  Just really, really sad.

But I'm trying something new.  I'm embracing the sad when it comes.  I'm not bottling it up.  I'm not pretending everything's okay.  And I'm not running away.  If I feel like cry, I am going to cry.  If I'm in a situation where I feel like I can't cry, then I leave and find a place I feel safe crying.  I don't try to rush it and I don't try to stifle it.  Sometimes I feel better after this, but most of the time I just feel numb.  But once I've cried and let the sadness happen, I move on.  I find a distraction.  I watch tv or read or clean my room or blog.  The sadness is still there, but it's kind of a released sadness.  I've acknowledged it's existence, I've stopped and expressed it, and I'm going on with my day knowing that sadness is still there, but trying not to let it consume me.

So, yes.  That's been the low.  I've been crying and moving on.  Sometimes I can distract myself until the sad fades into the background.  Sometimes I have to cry again 30 minutes later.  But it doesn't matter how often I cry.  What matters is that I am trying to not let this sadness define me.  Yes, I am incredibly sad. But "sad is not me," if that makes any sense.  By embracing the sad like this, I'm able to recognize and appreciate the good a little more.

Speaking of the good...

Let's pretend it's yesterday and do 30 Day Photo Challenge Day 10: Something I Made!

This is my dresser that I keep in my closet.  Technically, I didn't make the whole thing.  We found it on the side of our neighbor's curb waiting for trash pick up.  It was kind of stained and dirty, but we cleaned it and kept it on our back porch for a while.  This past summer, I gave it another good cleaning, sanded it and painted it. I think it's adorable and I love it :)  

Now fast forward back to today (back to the future?  or would that just be back?).

Day 11: Something Fun!

Well, right now this is more "That's exciting."  It will be fun when I get to redeem it.

My apartment complex did a few contests this morning to get people to recommend the complex to friends on Facebook.  It was basically whoever went to their Facebook page and clicked the "Recommend" button first won a prize.  I missed the first three, but I happened to log onto Facebook seconds after they posted the fourth status, so I recommended and won a gift certificate for a nearby hair salon!  

Not the best picture of me, but there you go!  The certificate says it's for a "style," so I'm not sure if that means something like a haircut with a blowout or if it means going in and getting your hair styled, like for a special occasion.  I'll call and find out at some point.  But either way, it's free! And I love free!  Plus, when they posted this picture on complex's facebook page, they captioned it with "We have some pretty cute winners here at (name of complex)!" which was a nice little confidence boost :)

Something else good that I don't have a picture for: I got to see my roommate from last year last night and today!  I've run into her a couple of times but I didn't get to actually spend time with her until last night.  Like I said, yesterday was a tough one for me.  I didn't have a lot of energy or motivation for anything.  I was lying in my bed at 10:30 trying to talk myself into at least taking a shower before going to sleep (yeah...that bad) when she texted me to invite me to a party she was at in my apartment complex (literally a minute walk from my door). I thought about it for a minute and decided to take control of myself.  I decided that I was going to take a shower, put on some make-up, put on an outfit that I feel good in and be social.  And I'm so glad I did it.  My old roomie is one of those girls that just knows what to say about things like this.  She's got that perfect combination of "That's so stupid," "Have hope," and "This will get easier," down.  I had barely talked to her since we moved out and I missed her! I got to have lunch with her today too, which was great!  Remember my post about Friendship from a few weeks ago?  I still have to remind myself that these friendships take effort if you want to maintain them, even if that effort is something that seems as small as getting out of bed and putting on some make-up.  Last night was a perfect example of how much that effort is worth it.  When I left the party last night, I wasn't thinking about how sad I was.  I was thinking about how glad I was that I made that effort and got to see my roommate again!  Baby steps can still get you places!

So there you have it.  The past couple of days have been incredibly difficult, but the good is what I need to appreciate and remember.  Today has been one month since the break-up.  Monday would have been our seventh month anniversary.  The next few days are going to continue to be difficult.  I am going to have highs and I am going to have lows.  But I will not let the lows define me or consume me and I will not let the highs go unnoticed.  I am going to pray a lot.  I am going to rely on my friends.  I am going to make efforts to keep those friends.  I am going to embrace the sad and be thankful for the good.  And, if I'm lucky, I'll make it off of this roller coaster without throwing up.

Kitchen Therapy

When I moved into my apartment, I discovered that I really love to cook and bake.  I just found it to be really relaxing.  One of my favorite things to do used to be making dinner for my (now ex-) boyfriend.  I loved sharing what I made with him and I loved how much he loved it. But after the break-up, I had no desire to go back into the kitchen.  It was (and still is) just huge reminder that I couldn't make him spaghetti or hamburger helper or cake balls anymore and that just makes me sad.  And without any appetite, it's not easy to get excited about cooking.  Despite this, I've still been collecting recipes online so that when I do feel ready to get back into the kitchen, I'll have something to make.

Tonight, I took a huge step.  Tonight, I baked.

The Recipe:  Bakerella's Red Velvet Cakesters (Like Oreo Cakesters, but way better)

It's a really simple recipe that comes together pretty quickly...or so I imagine.  You see, I'm in a college and I have a really tiny kitchen.

I have neither the room nor the funds for a hand mixer, so I had to mix everything by hand.  So making the cookie dough and the frosting took forever! But it was so worth it!

First, and possibly the most important step: You put on that super cute apron that you got at World Market for $10!

And yes, I did pull my hair back before I actually started baking.


The cookie dough has three ingredients: Red Velvet cake mix, eggs and butter.  Really simple (if you have a hand mixer..haha).  So you start with this:

And keep stirring and stirring and stirring until you get this:

And finally, 30 minutes later, when you think you're arm is about to fall off, you get this:

Pop those into the 350 degree oven for 10-12 minutes and now it's time to move on to the cream cheese frosting!  Cream cheese, butter, vanilla and a ton of powdered sugar.  Mmmmm!

If you were really smart, you would have taken the butter out of the fridge way before you even put on that really cute apron so that it could soften.  I am not really smart and thought I would cheat and soften the butter in the microwave.  This usually works if you don't forget that you're microwaving butter immediately after you set the microwave for a minute.

Yeah, I melted and entire stick of butter in the microwave.  Take two: I put the butter in a bowl.  Much less messy.

Since I didn't have a hand mixer, I decided to kind of "mush" the butter and cream cheese ahead of time so that when I put them together, they would be easier to combine.

Yumm! Maybe I should have made bagels...

Now would be an appropriate time to sneak a peek at your cookies :) 

Yummy :)

Now it's time for the powdered sugar.  The recipe calls for a pound, but I stopped a half cup short because I was adding the sugar only 1/4 cup at a time to make the mixing easier and my arm was protesting.  Plus, it kind of tasted perfect. 

                                               

At this point, the cookies have come out of the oven and cooled a bit (unless you have a hand mixer....) and you can assemble!

                                               

They're so cute!

I used my fantastic roommates as guinea pigs and we deemed the Cakesters a huge success!  Just make sure you have some milk when you eat them! They're really rich, so you will definitely need milk. 

I got about 16 Cakesters out of this recipe (and had a TON of leftover frosting).  I want to bring them into work tomorrow, but I might cut them in half so that there will be enough for everyone to have a taste.

Even doing this the caveman way, this recipe was super easy and delicious! 

Bakerella's Red Velvet Cakesters:

Red Velvet Sandwich Cookies:

1 box any brand red velvet cake mix

1/2 cup (1 stick) butter, softened to room temperature

2 eggs

• Preheat oven to 350 degrees
• Mix ingredients until combined
• Drop spoonfuls of cookie batter on cookie sheet about 2 inches apart 
• Bake for 10-12 minutes
• Cool

Cream Cheese Filling:

1/2 Cup (1 stick) butter, softened to room temperature

1-8 oz. package cream cheese, softened to room temperature

1lb. box of confectioners sugar

1 tsp. vanilla

• In a mixer, cream butter, cheese and vanilla.
• Gradually add sugar and mix until smooth

Makes about 12 cookies or 12 cookies sandwiches.

I will admit, I got pretty sad once the cookies were done because I couldn't share them with my (ex) boyfriend. Usually this was something I would bring to him as a little treat or a pick me up.  But tonight was a step.  A small step, but a step nonetheless. And it was therapeutic.  It was nice to get back to doing something that I enjoyed so much before everything kind of turned upside down.  

And now time for the 30 Day Photo Challenge!

Day 8: Faceless Self Portrait.

......

Does anyone have any clue what that means?

Something tells me that is not what the creator of this photo challenge had in mind...